Day 4 - September 21 - Chiang Mai to Lahu Village

Early morning wake-up call. We’re off to our trek near the Thai/Burmese boarder. Eight of us piled into the converted pickup truck and drove two hours to the trailhead. On the way we stopped at a small market to pick up any last minute provisions. Robin and I got some water, repellent and shampoo. My hair is starting to get mighty greasy and for the benefit of my fellow travelers, I thought some shampoo would do us well.

At the trailhead we put on our packs and started the 2.5 hour hike to a waterfall and pool. This was sold to us as an incredible sight. We would jump into a large picaresque pool and frolic in the water for an hour or so. At least, the people in the pictures had fun! First off, the trail had obviously not been traversed by hordes and hordes of Western tourists, which had been our initial fear. In fact, it was pretty wild and untamed. We had two guides, the English speaking Toto and the local hilltribesman we all called The Doctor. He was The Doctor, Toto eventually told us, because he had smoked more opium than anyone else in the village. Great. Tribesman Opium, MD. The Doctor had a machete and cut through the brush almost constantly. And this isn’t President Bush at the Crawford Ranch brush. This is serious bamboo-shoots and palm branch brush. The trail was also relatively muddy, as we are hear at the end of the rainy season. Robin had on his Vibram shoes (see link, no real explanation) and I had on my massive boots. We both did fairly well trudging through the mud. I, on the other hand, did not do so well with the incredible humidity. We already know that Kevin enjoys the dry heat and does not operate at his full potential in humid climates. I was schvitzing like I was running laps in a sauna.

Anyway, we got to the waterfall. It was nice enough. I enjoyed jumping in and cooling off. But there was no sun out and the clouds forming were looking ominous. So after 40 minutes messing around at the waterfall, we packed it up and called it a day. Time to push for the village. This was an uphill climb for about 30-45 minutes and the rain started coming down. The Doctor cut down some large palm leaves and made them into hats for us (I looked like a more eco-minded Gandalf from Lord of the Rings). They actually did keep the rain off and were helpful, until I did not see the branch in front of my face since the ‘bill’ of the hat was too far down my face and I smacked right into the branch. Not a lot of fun.

The rain slowed to couple of drops as we approached Lahu Village. We passed through the rice paddies surrounding the village as we got closer, and the view as the sun was setting was spectacular. The shallow water all around us shimmered as the sky turned gold. It was amazing.

We arrived at a small hilltribe village with maybe 30 or 35 huts. No one really paid us any attention as we entered and got ourselves settled. There was a guest hut for tourists. We each had a pad to sleep on, with a couple of blankets, and a mosquito net above us. After spending the night there, I wouldn’t really expect they got more than 15 to 18 tourists a week in the high season, but I am sure that is a welcome boon to their economy. The bathroom was a hole and the shower was a bucket of water with a smaller bucket to pour the water on yourself. It served its purpose. There was a cooler outside with sodas and bottled water for sale, 20 Baht per soda, 15 Baht per water. Altogether, a very nice place for a bunch of Western trekkers to see a local culture.

Robin and I went around to take pictures of the village. Chickens, pigs, roosters, ducks and dogs wandered the area freely. When we walked away from the guest hut, some children came up to see us. We started playing with them, showing them our cameras and showing them pictures. I still had some pictures from New York on my camera: the Highline, Flatiron and Empire State Building. When I showed these pictures to the children, they repeated, “Noo Yak!” It was really cute. One particular family of two brothers and a sister thought we were hilarious and proceeded to fight each other for our enjoyment. I guess siblings are the same everywhere.

Dinner was served soon after. Curry and rice. It was awesome. I think it was a green curry, but Toto was not really sure, he just said ‘curry.’ After dinner, we started telling stories with our new trekking friends. Someone brought up worst foods ever, and I knew I had the winner. I asked the two Swedish girls with us if they ever had surstromming. Ewwwww, yelled Emily. No, that is what our fathers eat in the late summer. It is disgusting. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure, it is disgusting. It is fermented herring, canned in an aluminum can which can expand to accommodate the gas emitted by the fermenting fish. It is awful, and can only be opened outside since the stench is so strong and pungent. Daniel Rovira provided it to us in Lake Tahoe a few years back. I vomited right there and Chris Stallsworth vomited that night. Worst thing ever. So, I won. We also spoke about our homes. Courtney, the Aussie dude, asked me about LA. I told him about Santa Monica and the Westside beaches. He said, “hey, isn’t that where all the Mexican eses live?” I shook my head, what? Eses? Has anyone used that word since 1996? He must be watching Baywatch reruns. Then 23-year old Usi asked Robin if he felt too old to be doing things like this. Yes, at 26 and 27, we are ancient and about to die. Thanks for making us feel old.

After our stories, Toto announces Night Bazaar! Crap! We got rushed by local women shoving bracelets and headbands and other textiles in our faces. All crap, once again, likely produced in China. I bought a bracelet for 10 Baht to make her go away. Others were not so lucky. Courtney bought a headband and Usi ended up with various ‘gifts.’ Then the children came to sing us songs. They started with Kumbaya and moved on to Jingle Bells. After those two gems they moved onto local Thai songs. That was all cute. Then they asked us to sing a song for them. So, we sang the theme to Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. They were confused. I don’t think they ever heard that one before. So we gave them Wonderwall and Row Row Row Your Boat. That was a crowd-pleaser. Then the girls distributed the candy they brought for the kids. Note to self. Next time, bring candy for the kids.

As the children ran away, Toto told us we could mill around and talk, go to sleep, or talk to The Doctor about other options. Our male comrades decided to take The Doctor up on his medicine and had some opium at 100 Baht a hit ($3). Robin and I retired like the old folks we are. Tomorrow is river rafting!